Controversial

This Friday is the “Big Game” in the WAC as the top two teams, Boise State and Hawaii face off on the island for all the marbles.

I’ve had a feeling about this Boise State football season that has been banging around in my head for the past few weeks. I have been unable to put my finger on just what it was. Maybe it was because I was so busy and didn’t have time to think. Maybe its because the very thought of it was distasteful to me as a fan, and I felt less of myself for even harboring the possibility. I’m torn. I’ve agonized personally but, I’ve spent some time deep in thought and I have came to a realization…

I would prefer Boise State to NOT play in a BCS game this year.

Now now, before you freak out on me, finish reading. I think I have a number of reasons, some personal, some external to back up my rather conflicted feelings.

For the record, does this mean I would be upset if they ended up making the Sugar Bowl? Absolutely not. I would be very very pleased if and when it happens. I mean, if someone is going to give you the opportunity on that stage again, the effects on the program would be HUGE.

That being said, there are several factors that have forced me to come to this conclusion.

I guess one of the biggest reasons I would rather them not go to the big game is that simply I don’t feel like coughing up the cash and trekking across the country at the holidays again to watch my boys play. I know what you’re thinking… “so, just don’t go.” Well, it’s not that simple. As I have said many times, I have one true sports passion, and that is Boise State football. How can I, as a fan, justify to myself skipping something so big? It’s not that I can’t come up with the money. Although, I do have a fairly major purchase upcoming which is possibly clouding my thought. I am definitely torn in this area.  It makes me feel totally cheap to not want to drop a grand or two. Even as I write this, part of my brain is saying, “you shithead… if it happens, of course we’re going to the game! Life is about experiences, tell me you wouldn’t spend $2k on the experience and feelings you’ve gotten from last year’s Fiesta Bowl.” And that voice would be right. That was worth every penny, if not 10x every penny.

But, at the same time, there is simply no way that any BCS game this year could top what happened last year. Not going to happen. Not in 100 years. Not when your team played in and won what was to many people, the greatest game in the history of the sport. There will be no game like that, no experience like that again in my life. I’m sure of it. There can be only one first time and all that goes with it, right? Plus, the feelings and emotions of that Fiesta Bowl are still very near the surface for me. Side story. When we drove down to Logan UT for the Boise State v. Utah State game last weekend, I broke out both last year’s season review DVD and the Out of the Blue movie to pop into the DVD player. Of course, as I was driving, I couldn’t watch… only listen. When they got to the actual bowl game stuff… hearing Paul J or the TV guys make those historic calls… I’m not afraid to admit that I teared up both times. Still do. That game still gives me shivers when I think about it. I still get emotional every time I see it, or in this case, just hear it.

I haven’t had time to put the Fiesta Bowl to bed in my memories yet. How can we do this all over again with another BCS game? Not to mention, what happens if I do spring for the game, and this time around we end up getting our heads kicked in by 25 points? Too scary to think about.

But at the same time, again, how could I not be there this year, simply on the off chance that we may catch lightning in a bottle again, however remote that chance is? I would be haunted if something similarly crazy and improbable happens and I was too cheap or stupid to pony up to be there.

I think another part of what I’m feeling is typical fan emotion. Namely, since last years magical run, we have a lot of new Boise State fans. Frankly, I think that is great. The more the merrier. Keep buying gear, keep going to games, keep donating to the program. However, there is part of me that is a little… I don’t know the word… not jealous. Irrational, maybe. I was a fan back when. Back when we sucked. Back when Idaho beat us 12 times in a row. Back when we had that disastrous 2-10 season in 1996. That makes this time in Bronco football all the sweeter. But to my mind, all these bandwagon fans somehow haven’t earned this glory time we’re living in by not having the privilege of rooting for the Broncos through thick and thin. It’s been all roses and gumdrops for them (losses to Boston College and Washington notwithstanding). I guess I worry if it gets too good around here, all these new people will simply come to expect the biggest and best every year, anything less than a BCS birth is a disappointment, and that simply won’t happen. I know eventually something bad will happen. I fear the reaction of these fans when it does. I honestly don’t want anything to go bad, of course, but shit does happen. Look at Notre Dame this year. ‘Nuff said.

This brings us to another facet of this argument. Last year, we won every game, and they hype and desire built a little more each game until it reached its full crescendo that glorious afternoon in Nevada. We knew… we win, we’re in. This season, with that early loss to Washington, we figured we were done insofar as a BCS game was concerned. Last year, they couldn’t keep us out. We had big convincing wins over Oregon State (who beat USC) and Utah.  We beat 6 bowl teams. This year, we lost to a bad Washington team, and didn’t really play anyone else. Even providing that we beat Hawaii, they are the weakest undefeated team I have ever seen, and most of the pollsters agree with me. The respect factor for this team just isn’t very high. This is evidenced just this last weekend. We crushed Idaho 58-14, yet somehow dropped in the polls, getting jumped by Virginia who didn’t even play. What does that tell us? It says, the college football world does not want a 1 loss non-BCS team in the big dance. As crazy as it sounds, I kinda agree with them.

A BCS birth for a non-BCS team, in the current system, should be a reward for an exceptional team… an exceptional season. A team without a blemish. A team that took on all comers, and didn’t stumble once. That team should get the chance to prove how good they are. That didn’t happen for Boise State this year. As a fan, do I know we are good? Abso-freakin-lutely. We may well be as good, if not better this year. But we didn’t run the table. Plus, the WAC is horrible this year. Our only conference tests so far have come against Nevada who is the most inconsistent team I’ve seen this year and Fresno, who still isn’t “back” from their horrible 4-8 season last year. I want people nationally to recognize Boise State as a growing power that has to be dealt with. I don’t want to give the haters more ammunition to attack us with, aka. “they don’t deserve a BCS game because they played nobody and didn’t earn it.” They could say that last year, but it rang hollow. I say a lot more damage could be done to the program by getting into a BCS game that the bulk of the fans say we didn’t deserve, then losing that game. The fallout from that could be brutal. See the Georgia game 2 years ago. It took the magic of the Fiesta Bowl to put that beast to bed, otherwise people would STILL be saying, “yeah, but, what about Georgia?”

Right now, for us to get into a BCS bowl, we need about a dozen things to fall right. Last year, again, it was “win and you’re in”. I don’t want to ‘back’ into the bowl game. I want to be so dominant that they have to recognize us. I just got a 3 page email from a guy in my office detailing out about a dozen different scenarios of who needs to win and who needs to lose in order for Boise State to possibly get in. That’s not sexy. That’s not dominating.

*sigh*

I have so say, the more I write about this subject, the less confident I feel in my conclusions. Going in, I thought I had a solid grasp on where my head was. But reading back, every single reason I have presented seems so flimsy and hollow when actually put to words.

That part of my brain… the non-rational heavy emotional side is starting to assert itself. It is screaming at me that I am a total ‘tard for thinking such nonsense. It is basically telling me to just shut up, quit yer whining and just enjoy the ride. This is your team. You always root for the absolute best and let the chips fall where they may.

I know it is very bad form to change your point of view while writing a single article. Something so wishy-washy will never cut it in the real journalism world. But you know what, I ain’t a writer and this isn’t a persuasion piece any more. I’m just a schmuck with a website and too much time on my hands.

I guess what all this boils down to is that there is no way that this year could possibly top last year, so I’d rather not even try. As if to not taint what last year meant. But you know what? To hell with that. Quit being a wus, man up, and root for your team. Damn the torpedoes.

Oh, who am I kidding. I’m still conflicted. I will probably remain conflicted until the situation settles itself in the next couple weeks. All I’m going to do is root for Boise State to kick the ultimate hell out of Hawaii and then go from there.

Just don’t expect me to be crying in my beer if we don’t make it… just the same, don’t be surprised to find me in New Orleans on New Years Day if everything comes to pass.

The one thing I do know… GO BRONCOS.