“If I did it, here’s how” Wait… what?!

Fox finally came to their senses before I had a chance to write about this, but I’m still going to.

I’m sure you all heard about OJ Simpson’s book and TV Special (two parts, no less) where the premise was, “I didn’t kill my wife, but, if I had, here is how I did it”. My reaction to this? Stunned silence. I couldn’t even form a rational thought. On what planet would this come across as a good idea? Seriously. How, in good conscience, could Fox both publish a book and show a two part TV special about this so-called hypothetical situation? Did they somehow forget that 2 people were brutally murdered? I was flabbergasted.

Thankfully, the sheer volume of bad press Fox had received for this ill-conceived idea convinced them that, “uh… maybe giving millions of dollars and two hours of prime time air to a murderer isn’t such a good business plan after all.” Yes, I said it. There is simply no question anymore that OJ is guilty. Looking back, you have to marvel at just how he got off.

Such a thing would not happen today. With the glut of CSI’s and Law and Order’s that are multiplying across our TV screens, is there anyone who doesn’t understand DNA evidence anymore? Of course not. However, 11 years ago, the prosecution had to spend weeks explaining it all with all the pizazz of a high school biology lecture. I mean, they found OJ’s DNA at the scene of the crime, and found the victims DNA at his house, in his car, on his clothes, etc. Try this case on our current prime time shows and it’s as ‘slam dunk’ as you can get. They have OJ convicted before the first commercial break. But back then, after the trial was over, one juror was quoted as saying he didn’t understand the DNA stuff at all, and didn’t consider it in his deliberations. Wow…

Even better was the defense his lawyers concocted. They didn’t even bother to try to defend OJ (what does that tell you?), instead their case was this. On one hand they were saying that the LA Police, within minutes of finding two people brutally murdered, they decided who was guilty and set in motion an elaborate frame up of an african-american man involving hundreds of officers and dozens of pieces of evidence, all of which had to be coordinated executed flawlessly. All without even knowing if he was even in the country at the time. Yet, at the VERY SAME TIME they were arguing that the LA Police were so incompetent that all of the evidence they collected was contaminated and every procedure of evidence handling was violated. Well, which is it? Thus, the Chewbacca Defense was born.

Anyway, this all brings us back to this whole “If I Did It” thing. I wonder who’s idea this was, exactly. The remarkable thing is that this whole thing would not even be subject to the Son of Sam laws preventing people from profiting from their crimes. Apparently, speaking in hypotheticals is a loophole no one thought of before. I wonder if Berkowitz were to write a new book titled, “I swear I didn’t shoot all those people or hear the neighbors dog telling me to do it, but if I had, it might have gone something like this” could he then get paid for that?

Of course, this is all a moot point now since those people that were involved are now running for cover. Thank god. I simply cannot believe that there was someone, anyone, involved in this project who thought that this was a good idea. I’m all for making money, but this was a sick and disgusting way to do it.

I will not, however, give Fox any credit at all for canceling this abortion. They approved it in the first place and are now just trying to save some face. You are already guilty for having greenlit this in the first place. Canceling it now does not make you good people.

Hope you can sleep at night.

I’m guessing there is a special layer of hell reserved for the Juice.